Mandy Montanez

My struggle is how to say goodbye to somebody whose relationship I can’t even define. It’s hard because the bond we had never fit into any category I knew. My mother always said Manny was a brother to her. That to me was so confusing; he was like a brother to me, but sometimes he was an uncle, but he was always a friend. He never fit into one label; he was all of them. He embodied the definition of chosen family, which is such a powerful thing when you have your own amazing family and you choose to love others as if they were your blood. There isn’t one moment of my life that I recall not having Manny around. One of the few people that was always a presence of support and love. How does one define a lifetime of memories to just one thought? From the early days of childhood, I recall play fighting and really just tormenting Manny as he tried to sleep after being out all night being a DJ.

My love of music was influenced by many people but none as much as Manny. It was just a normal day in Long Island in my childhood home for Manny to literally raise the roof as he played music while Mom cleaned the house. I can still hear him saying, “Betsey, want me to turn it up?”

As an adult, when I first went to a club, I lit up as the music brought me to life. I heard Manny telling me how we need to feel it and just go with it; he said it’s in your blood.

As a young adult, Manny was always in my and my siblings’ corner. His home was our home. The tradition of talking at the dining room table about nothing for hours. He always turned the conversation to what was going on in my life, asking how work was, his most encouraging phrase: “So Alex, what’s next?” Every time he asked this, I thought, yeah, this promotion is just a stepping stone — what’s next? He saw potential in me I couldn’t yet see. It was the kindest encouragement anybody could give me. When at times I was full of doubt and just uncomfortable in the world, I was never uncomfortable at Manny and Christine’s house.

So many things to thank him for: always looking out for my mom, bringing Christine, Aaron, and Philip into my life, and continuing his legacy of family being more than blood, a blessing passed onto him from his mother, as she was my Titi and my mom’s friend for as long as I could remember.

To my friend Manny, I say I will always miss you. To my brother Manny, I say I will always carry your love and your laugh with me until the day I leave this earth. To my uncle Manny, I say I have learned so much from you about life, and I will cherish those memories and never let the bond you built with Aaron, Philip, Christine, Isabella, and Sophia be broken.

Much love to Manny Man, DJ AlmaSol. Your spirit will stay alive with all of us, and I will never forget you. The family that chooses you is the most beautiful family of all. Much Love-Alex